No Stranger To Shame

I think it’s a fair statement to say that anyone who has ever seen me fail, knows that I have often failed spectacularly. Failures of mine come with embarrassment, enigmatic errors and explosions as far as the eye can see. Long story short: I’m no stranger to shame.

Due to my experience with failure (and my tolerance towards the ensuing embarrassment), I often fail without thought or fear. This is an essential personality for learning exactly how I fail, and how to improve upon this type of failure. Reading Apprenticeship Patterns’ reflection on the topic has also helped me come to terms with “failure analysis”.

According to the book, everyone has experienced failure at some point; people that haven’t either never left their comfort zone, or are denying a past failure. It also dabbles on selecting which failures are worth improving upon to salvage sub-par skills. Finally, it admits that some skills may have to be left to rot, as an example of embracing our non-perfect nature.

I agree with the idea that no one is perfect; extending on the topic, I also agree that “ditching” some forms of failure are necessary to becoming a specialized worker. As the old saying goes: “a jack of all trades is a master of none”; I admit myself that trying to work on various topics only results in a mess of files, each one being less impressive than a single, focused file of well-written software.

However, I run into conflict with the pattern early on: its solution mentions “working on problems that are worth fixing”. In my opinion, as contrary as it may be to my above statements, ALL problems are worth fixing. The priority should be chronological, not a binary form of “assert/ignore”. Yes, figuring out our failures and becoming specialized is great, but even a specialist should be somewhat familiar with as much material as possible. A good team member benefits from a great crew, but can also proceed on their own (even if the progress slows down).

Going forward, I plan on using this pattern in my Capstone adventures (as well as my professional career) by trying to figure out what my specialty is. Which failures are the most extravagant? Which ones are fixable? Which ones are worth the effort despite the challenge? A big problem about my stance in computer science is that my stance is too vague (this was the original reason why I declared this major).

Hopefully, I will be able to cut down on this “vagueness”; despite computer programming being applicable in many fields, I will find the one that I am meant to work in. By finding my failures, the search will increment ever more closely to a successful result.

Published by Mike Morley (mpekim)

Current student at WSU. Knowledgeable of C/C++, Java and Python. Always interested in learning the basics of as many languages as possible.

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